Our chief feline rodent office, Ziggy, the daft Burmese blue, has failed in his duties to protect the barn from rodent invasion. As you can see from the picture above, Ziggy may be in the wrong job.
His excuse is that he is understaffed, overworked, unpaid, never gets a day off, and the recruitment campaign to find him some helpers has failed miserably, as the two daft feral kittens have turned into stay at home don't go out lazy cats, and the one that is willing to come outdoors and patrol is daft as a brush and in terms of rodent control as useless as a chocolate teapot. He makes so much noise announcing he is there, that the mice have plenty of time to leave home and find a safe place out of the way of a feline inspection.
His excuse is that he is understaffed, overworked, unpaid, never gets a day off, and the recruitment campaign to find him some helpers has failed miserably, as the two daft feral kittens have turned into stay at home don't go out lazy cats, and the one that is willing to come outdoors and patrol is daft as a brush and in terms of rodent control as useless as a chocolate teapot. He makes so much noise announcing he is there, that the mice have plenty of time to leave home and find a safe place out of the way of a feline inspection.
Sam the black and white Felix cat is exactly like the one on TV, daft, google eyes, full of fun, not a brain cell to rattle. Fudge, his brother, is Horatio from CSI Miami, so laid back he is horizontal. Fudge's idea of a heavy day is posing in a sunbeam, with our without his sunglasses. Bunny, the other black and white one, is dangerous outside - climbing up trees, falling out of trees (trip to vet Bank Holiday Monday) - falling in ponds (discovering that despite belief cats do not walk on water...). She is best to stay inside as it keeps the vet bills down though lying on the hob is not the best idea - fortunately it has a child lock on it and Bunny so far hasn't worked out how to remove it. Lying on top of the Aga only works for a while then there is a distinct singeing of Bunny fluff. She and Sam have a lot in common in the Mensa department.
The latest rodent control failure happened yesterday - Mum had to move the lawnmower when our hay was delivered, under the lawnmower she found a nest of mice. Tiny baby mice, eyes not even open yet. Being a softy, she put them in a safe place in the hope their mum would come back for them. But as she says, when you employ a team of rodent control professionals, and give them board and lodging, you expect results.
Ziggy's explanation is that of course being a mere cat, he is not expected to tunnel through concrete under the mower in order to unearth a nest of mice. While he has a point about that, the mice have got so complacent that they are even committing suicide by jumping into water buckets and drowning themselves. Mum says she really does not appreciate seeing this first thing in the morning.
Maybe a job for Spencer.
Ziggy would like to post some pictures of his co-workers so that you can evaluate their suitability as serious rodent control operatives.
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